Category: Kashmir

by Ajaz Ahmad Khawaja

To create a more inclusive and supportive culture for introverts, societies must strongly discourage negative feedback about them from their talkative counterparts. This may require providing more opportunities for privacy and quiet environments.

Sitting in the cafeteria of his college, Rehan is nursing his coffee but is lost in thought. His heart races as he watches one of his peers approaching him – his mind scrambling for a way to avoid the impending interaction. Shrinking into his chair, he tries to focus on his coffee.

The boy is upon him, his voice cutting through the noise of the restaurant like a sharp-edged blade. “Rehan!” said the boy. His voice boomed – shattering the silence and causing Rehan to jolt in his seat. He wanted nothing more than to be alone. He is desperate to escape the constant barrage of noise and attention. The sound of his name is like a physical blow – such hard that Rehan can feel himself shrinking under his weight. His mind is a whirlwind of emotions as he struggles to find a way out of this situation.

Such incidents occur on a regular basis in Rehan’s life. It holds nothing new. He has devised numerous ways to get out of such tight spots. On some occasions, Rehan may have to pretend to be on the phone and skip the gathering to trick everyone else. Or he may have to devise new ways to escape scenes that are unfavourable to his persona.

Why is Rehan feeling this way? Why is he suddenly so unwilling to interact with others? The answer is not so complex. Rehan is an introvert! He cannot do anything but deal helplessly with such situations –  in a society that does not recognise introversion at all.

People like Rehan are individuals who prefer to be alone or engage in quieter, solitary activities because they are more introspective and reflective. They may be more sensitive to stimuli like social events and crowds. They generally prefer to spend time in quiet, low-stimulation surroundings. Introversion is a spectrum feature. But make no mistake, people like Rehan are not a monolithic group. They possess their own unique set of characteristics and tendencies, existing along a spectrum.

Take Rehan, for example. He may exhibit traits of social introversion, finding comfort in small, tight-knit groups of friends. Or perhaps he is a thinking introvert, drawn to the depths of seclusion where his mind can wander through the labyrinths of thought. Or maybe, an anxious introvert, feeling suffocated by the pressures of social interaction and seeking refuge in the safety of his room environment.

It is possible for a person to be both shy and extroverted, or talkative and introverted. These characteristics are not mutually exclusive. It is common for people to have traits from both ends of the spectrum. A shy extrovert may enjoy socializing and being around other people, but may still feel nervous or self-conscious in certain situations, such as public speaking. On the other hand, a talkative introvert may feel comfortable speaking in front of others with no stage fright, but may still prefer to spend time alone or in a small group rather than in a large crowd.

MBTI Assessment

Introversion is one among 16 different personality types identified by the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI). The MBTI is a popular personality assessment tool constructed by a mother-daughter duo Katharine Cook Briggs and her daughter Isabel Briggs Myers.

It defines introversion as a preference for inward-focused attention and reflection instead of seeking external stimulation and interaction with others. The MBTI is based on the theories of Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung and is used to help people understand their own personality characteristics and how they interact with others. People who score high in introversion on MBTI tend to be more introspective and reserved, while those who score low tend to be more outgoing and sociable.

However, it is important to distinguish between introversion and shyness because they are two distinct characteristics that must be handled in separate ways. Understanding a person’s individual traits, whether shyness or introversion, can aid in identifying solutions to cope with or overcome the trait. It can also assist in the improvement of communication and understanding within relationships, as well as in the development of a more inclusive and understanding society.

Introversion versus Slyness

Shyness is characterised by a tendency to feel uneasy or self-conscious in social circumstances, particularly with strangers. It is a fear of rejection. It implies submissiveness—which can further lead to avoiding social contact and deteriorating relationships altogether. Shyness is often perceived as a negative trait; however, it is not always an issue until it interferes with a person’s everyday routine.

Introversion is characterised by a fondness for isolation and calm surroundings. Introverts may prefer to spend their time alone—thinking and pondering—and may find social circumstances exhausting or overwhelming. They may not be shy, but they do prefer solitude and introspection and ghost-quiet surroundings.

A shy person may long to be in the spotlight and gain exposure, but a lack of confidence can inhibit their ability to say or do what they need. An introvert, on the other hand, likes to spend time alone and avoids the spotlight. These two personalities are fundamentally opposed—with one wanting attention and the other seeking isolation. In order to follow their need for exposure, the shy person may need to focus on improving their self-esteem, whilst the introvert may need to push themselves out of their comfort zone in order to fully adapt to social situations.

The Introvert Behaviour Introverts tend to speak a lot less than extroverts, but this does not, in any way, signify that they dislike people or that they need to be fixed. Thinking (a lot) before speaking is one of their main characteristics, followed by communicating in writing rather than speaking out loud. Chatting on the internet does the job!

This does not make them any less social; it simply means they interact with the environment in a different way. Both introverts and extroverts have unique abilities worth bringing to the table. An introvert, though, is always hesitant to ask for favours, no matter to what extent they need them. They always prioritise self-reliance and believe more in helping those who are in dire need of it. Rather than attempting to alter someone who is an introvert, it is comparatively better if their distinctions are respected and appreciated.

Introversion is not a medical condition that narrows a person’s ability to achieve success and reach the pinnacle of their profession. Many prominent introverts have accomplished significant success in their respective fields, including Albert Einstein, JK Rowling, Bill Gates, Mahatma Gandhi, Abraham Lincoln, Johnny Depp, Manmohan Singh, and Sachin Tendulkar.

Charles Bukowski, a well-known German-American writer, an introvert himself, famously remarked, “I do not hate people. I just feel better when they are not around”. This quotation exemplifies Bukowski’s conviction in the benefits of isolation—as well as the notion that introverts can thrive when given the opportunity to be by themselves.

Not Taken SeriouslyUnfortunately, introverts are undervalued in many of our societies. Most cultures place a strong emphasis on extroversion. This can make it difficult for introverts to completely express themselves and feel comfortable in their own skin. The urge to adhere to extroverted ideals is perhaps the most familiar obstacle that introverts encounter in society.

They may feel intimidated to participate in social activities with which they are uncomfortable. To engage in small chats and other superficial exchanges may not come naturally to them. This can be especially difficult in places, where socialising is sometimes regarded as crucial for prosperity and job progress. Because of their quieter and more reserved character, introverts are frequently targeted by bullies. As a result of being viewed as easy targets or weak, they may be exposed to emotional, or verbal abuse— if not physical.

Introverts are prone to suffer social complications that extend beyond instances of bullying. Because of their more reserved persona, they may be hesitant to call a waiter in a restaurant for fear of drawing everyone else’s attention to themselves. They may also be concerned about making a loud phone call or engaging in other forms of public communication. Shopping—which frequently requires engaging with salespeople—may be a difficult experience for introverts. In these instances, it is essential to acknowledge and promote introverts while also working to create a more inclusive and accepting atmosphere for all individuals.

Another difficulty that introverts may confront is the stigma of being introverted. Introversion is perceived as a negative personality trait, and introverts are treated as socially distant, or even anti-social. This might leave introverts feeling misunderstood or alienated, making it more difficult for them to connect with others. Lack of support and understanding for introverts can easily contribute to feelings of isolation and loneliness. Introverts may find it difficult to locate others who share their interests and values and may feel as if they do not fit in with mainstream society. This can be especially difficult in contexts where there is a strong emphasis on teamwork and collaboration, such as crowded offices, schools, or businesses.

To create a more inclusive and supportive culture for introverts, societies must strongly discourage negative feedback about them from their talkative counterparts. This may require providing more opportunities for privacy and quiet environments.

If asked, they should be allowed to work separately. Tailored communication and fostering a more tolerant and understanding attitude towards introverts may also entail fighting the stigma associated with them. They just get more out of a peaceful sunset evening than a large crowd partying together. They can be assisted in reaching their full potential by providing them with a more inclusive and welcoming atmosphere. Identify them with their behavioural patterns.

Stay informed, one among the four of us is Rehan!

(The author is a teacher in the Department of School Education in Jammu and Kashmir. The opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not purport to reflect the opinions or views of TheNewsCaravan.)